I recently read something that was so good, but so terrible, all at the same time.

In my school’s alumni magazine, this man said he went to school and got a degree in pol/sci and business administration, but he wished he didn’t. He said he felt he was meant to be a musician and try to make it that way.

He said he wished he could have started over, and that while he was an attorney, this was his day job to pay the bills, and it’s not the same. It was never what he wanted; he was just concerned he’d never have a job doing what he loved.

He said he’s a musician, in a band and puts out cds, but it’s his hobby, not his career. He went on to say he is not truly fulfilled, that “music has always been my love, and what I’m good at, my real calling, but I didn’t pursue it.” He said he would advise: follow your heart with the talents and gifts you are given, follow your intuition when it comes to your work, and if you are living something you feel is your calling, then you will be happy and fulfilled.

Not living my dream is my biggest fear, and that’s why, while I’m glad I have a social work degree, so I can actually hold a job, I am going to write my brains out until I have it as a job no matter how hard it will be for me. Because this is my DREAM and it’s up to ME to make it a reality, and thankfully, now it is one, with my first self-published book out. I tell everyone who asks me what’s next “I’m getting started!”

It makes me feel sick and anxious and hyper all at the same time when I read accounts like this from people who regret their major life decisions and wished they could go back and try what they really wanted to do. Sick because they can’t go back, anxious because I never want to let that happen to me, and hyper because it makes me think, how can I avoid doing this to myself?

Sure there are only so many factors you can control, but my advice for everyone is to go against the grain and go for it. I self-published my book on 8/9 (accidently, I didn’t realize what clicking the button meant, oh well! I meant to wait till 8/15!) during my last week of age 29. My goal was to be published by 29 because my favorite writer was, and I made it happen. Also, I know it was fate because I NEVER would have never been ready before this year, it was not the right timing, I would have had anxiety and could have never talked to anybody about it or put it out there, but now I so can and am so excited about it! I looked at it again seriously for the first time in four years in February 2015 and then one day in March in the middle of a random Tuesday at work, I’m just like, ‘Do it. Pick a day and publish it already.’ So I picked 8/15 and the rest is history.

And if you think you can’t, I’m telling you, you can!!!!! If I can do it, believe me, anyone can do it!!!!!